Bad timing to be thrown this bundle of emotions. A rude shock. And a realization of how much I actually REALLY want this to work out.

My heart's reaction causes me to question if I've just been paying lip service to the notion of "His will be done" all along. As much as I've chosen not to think about it and trust that if it's meant to be then it will happen, I am quite taken aback at how that short conversation affected me so much and stole my faith so easily. Maybe I have to rethink things. Whether I've truly grown in faith, whether I've learnt to really rely on Him rather than on my whims.

Coping mechanism kicked in instantly: to write. (On twitter, no less)

Here's a reminder. Lest I lose sight.

"Dear me, come what may, don't lose sight of the bigger picture and The Perfect Will. Rejoice. Embrace. Persevere. Celebrate. Come what may."